We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize