you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Randomize