I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
