okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
