SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
