let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
