Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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