if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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