she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize