So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
