Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize