We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
