singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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