you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
