The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
