so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
