they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize