I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
