I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
