Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
she looked like the before picture.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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