Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
