Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
