Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
