She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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