he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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