worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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