I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
