Its about making memories worth repressing
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
