Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
