WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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