I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
