yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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