Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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