Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
