i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
