Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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