New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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