I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
