addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
