We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
porn star boner night. come get it.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
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