WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
