Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
farters have to be the big spoon...
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
