I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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