I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize