i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
