Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I just want nice things and good sex
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
