Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Randomize
