Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
So much rum. So many feels.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
