tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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