People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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