Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
